Infinity And A Day More...

Infinity And A Day.......More.

2006-09-22T14:33:00.000-07:00

This is my last blog here. I am now moving to a new site http://web.mac.com/aiyappa/ on my .Mac account. More beautiful, more organised and more me :)

This is where the 'more' in the infinity appears.

A nice little mail I once recieved.....

2006-08-23T13:10:00.000-07:00

A professor stood before his Philosophy class and had
some items in front of him.

When the class began, wordlessly, he picked up a very
large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill
it with golf balls.

He then asked the students if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and
poured them into the jar.

He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the
open areas between the golf balls.

He then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They agreed it was.

The professor next picked up a box of sand and poured
it into the jar.

Of course, the sand filled up everything else.

He asked once more if the jar was full.

The students responded with an unanimous "yes."

The professor then produced two cups of coffee from
under the table and poured the entire contents into
the jar, effectively filling the empty space between
the sand.

The students laughed.

"Now," said the professor, as the laughter subsided,
"I want you to recognize that this jar represents your
life.

"The golf balls are the important things - your God,
family, your children, your health, your friends, and
your favorite passions - things that if everything
else was lost and only they remained, your life would
still be full.

"The pebbles are the other things that matter like
your job, your house, and your car.

"The sand is everything else--the small stuff.

"If you put the sand into the jar first," he
continued, "there is no room for the pebbles or the
golf balls.

"The same goes for life.
"If you spend all your time and energy on the small
stuff, you will never have room for the things that
are important to you.

"Pay attention to the things that are critical to your
happiness.

Play with your children.

"Take time to get medical checkups.

"Take your partner out to dinner.

"There will always be time to clean the house and fix
the disposal.

"Take care of the golf balls first, the things that
really matter.

"Set your priorities.

"The rest is just sand."

One of the students raised her hand and inquired what
the coffee represented.

The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked.

"It just goes to show you that no matter how full your
life may seem,there's always room for a cup of coffee
with a friend."

....and this ones' for me.... :))

2006-08-19T07:25:00.000-07:00

I kept the right ones out
And let the wrong ones in
Had an angel of mercy
To see me through all my sins
There were times in my life
When I was goin' insane
Tryin' to walk through the pain

And when I lost my grip
And I hit the floor
Yeah, I thought I could leave
But couldn't get out the door
I was so sick n' tired
Of livin' a lie
I was wishing that I would die

It's amazing
With the blink of an eye
You finally see the light
It's amazing
That when the moment arrives
You know you'll be alright
It's amazing
And I'm saying a prayer
For the desperate hearts tonight

That one last shot's a Permanent Vacation
And a how high can you fly with broken wings
Life's a journey - not a destination
And I just can't tell just what tomorrow brings

You have to learn to crawl
Before you learn to walk
But I just couldn't listen
To all that righteous talk
I was out on the street
Just tryin' to survive
Scratchin' to stay alive

It's amazing
With the blink of an eye
You finally see the light
It's amazing
That when the moment arrives
You know you'll be alright
It's amazing
And I'm saying a prayer
For the desperate hearts tonight

"So, from all of us at Aerosmith
to all of you out there, wherever you are.
Remember- the light at the end of the tunnel
may be you. Goodnight!

Amazing
Aerosmith
Get A Grip

A Time Lived ?

2006-08-17T12:48:00.001-07:00

There was a time when i believed that i lived.Every breath i took was scented, and every move i made was ochrestated. The dance of life never ending and the song of faith so true. The spring was spring with the winter two seasons away. It would never come, the winter. The cold harsh winds were not for me, and the blankets were destined to their dooms in their closets.

Life has its ways. And the winter will come. The harsh wind will freeze and make the heart so cold that no feelings will dare to fight back. So insesitive that the break will be a tickle. A joke of a jester never to be taken seriously, even by the the most feared of the kings.

Where did i go wrong. Or was i right as always. Had my ego engulfed me in such a blanket of darkness that so blinded me and kept me away from the realities of the frost. Did i lose my veins in vain or madness. Was my defeat a legend to be fortold for generations to come, to make my shame eternal.

As a kid i was confortable, without the knowledge of the ways of the cruel heart. The love for everything so genuine feels so childish. But, maybe, that was the only true love that i may have experienced, that of which will take a lifetime to forget. That, which will make me regret to the end of this life.

The spring shall come like the winter once froze. And the astronomical existence will continue without remorse of the loss of a single soul.

Seasons. Happiness. Remorse. Will stay.

I am just human, with a dream of divinity. Something, only the gods and angels seem to deserve. We are entitled only shame of our actions and the regret of our passions. As we morbidly continue our meaningless lives of achievement, only to be neutralised by our deaths.

Some of us will make it to the books, and some will stay obscure, with a new born baptised with a name so copied.

All rise from the ashes like the mythical phoenix. While they still burn, will a rebirth be so rejoiced. The pain never ending and the flames so engulfing.

Shall i survive or shall i give up as a patriot and call it romantic. Shall i stay and and watch myself burn or be reborn to eternise my rebellion.

Is it the time i lived, or a time i lived to die.

My last ever dedication for M..... :((

2006-08-04T01:31:00.000-07:00

The saddest day of my life,.....yet, but wouldnt want it to go without a song.....

From where I stand
I can see through you
From where you're sitting, pretty one
I know it got to you

I see the stars in your eyes
You want the truth, but you need the lies
Like Judy Garland, like Valentino
You give your life for rock n' roll
Uh huh

Stand
We're on a landslide of love
You got everything you want
But what you need
You give away

For primitive love
And a ride on the mystery train
A primitive love
A room at the heart
The heartbreak hotel

A room at the heartbreak
Heartbreak hotel
A room at the heartbreak
Heartbreak hotel

You say it's love, it's not the money
You let them suck your life out like honey
Turning tricks, you're on the street
Selling your kisses so bittersweet

My life / Yeah
Oh, yeah yeah yeah
I wanna love
Did he bed again?
I gotta know
Oh the price
Is too hard to pay

A primitive love
And a ride on the mystery train
A primitive love
A room at the heart
The heartbreak hotel

A Room At The HeartBreak Hotel,
U2

2006-05-01T02:39:00.000-07:00

Pepper.

Of morality and more....

2006-05-01T02:35:00.000-07:00

The pay commision is down upon us and all our salaries are going higher. The economy of our country couldnt have been beeter. On second glance, it is still getting better.

But a better pay package and a god economy, does it make an advancement in the betterment of a country?

A higher pay package would definately encourage those employees in the lower rungs to work more responsibly. They would now, not resort to easier "sources of income", just because they were "paid too less". The quality of life might definately improve. Morality must improve. People will work harder, which inturn would improve the economy of the country, and so forth.

Do economically strong countries, like The Americas and Britain, face problems like bribery and corruption? Atleat from what we get to see from T.V., their police force is really good. Most of their officers have their own patrol cars, and they are in the crime scene in a matter of seconds. But then again it is the economy of their country.

Reality may not be economy based after all. Reality may be the basic psyche of an individual towards his personal morality. Is it connected with nationality and hence the economy?

But the stains of human evils will remain. The want for more will forever debate with morality. Economy, self's and the nation's, has got nothing to do with it.

Misguided

2006-05-01T02:09:00.000-07:00

The death of Dr Rajkumar was mourned by everyone. Everyone? Who is he? An actor of the yesteryears who potrayed the common man and enacted their dreams and fantasies. But really, who is he?

No one outside the good state of Karnataka seems to know him. He was an icon, an inspiration to the misguided youth and a say to anything. Is it?

Many may know what he has done for his "people", in his lifetime. And many will come to revere him for this. But fo the rest of us, really, who is he?

All I know is, he is the guy who brought Bangalore City to a halt. His death triggered a mindless violence in which many were harmed. They beat up a cop to death, during the ensuing violence. Was the poor soul insulting the dead icon in any manner? Was he a bachelor? Was he living alone? Did he have a family to feed, a sister to marry, children to educate? Was he a fan?

He might not have been and he might have been. But what was definately true that he was doing his job and he died on the call of duty. The 'people' forgot this. They forgot that apart from their own misguided, miserable lives, they have a family to look back to, someone at home looking forward for them. And yet they yield their power of being in a mob in taking another's life, with so much intensity and passion tha speaks of no remorse or mourning.

I pray for the dead policeman and his broken family, and I pray that I wont die a useless death.

2006-04-08T22:42:00.000-07:00

Me :)

2006-04-08T22:41:00.000-07:00

Holi....

2005-12-15T07:14:00.000-08:00

Industry And Clear Skies.....Rare?

I...

2005-12-15T06:56:00.001-08:00

Here I am sitting, having a cup of coffee, thinking of the existence i enjoy. All the metaphysical 'seasons' I go through. Spring,rain, storms. Does that make me a 'weathered' man?

I have climbed mountains, swam across oceans, lied on my back in the grass and lazed around. I am a traveller.

I have fought for my thoughts, my individuality, people's indifference, defended against their anarchy, kept double standards of the mind at bay. I am a soldier.

I have laughed trouble away, smiled at failure and been cheerful with my advesaries. I have laughed at the world. I am a clown.

I have loved my friends, love a woman, had nothing against my enemies, appreciated the music of traffic, hummed my favourite song in the freezing cold and lived a simple life. I am a poet.

I have been wet in the rain, in the sweat of hardwork, by the tears of pain and also happiness. I like the wet look. Wet after a bath, wet with imagination, wet with accomplishment, wet on victory. i like wet. I am a fish.

I am ferocious in my thoughts, my beliefs, my rights, my interests, my loyalty, my integrity, my faith, my honour, my self respect. I am an animal.

I hope to make it on my own, live my life the way i define it and fight throgh it all. I am me. I am a survivor.

2005-12-05T21:10:00.000-08:00

Rajesh's Bedspread

When You Will Be Gone

2005-12-05T20:51:00.000-08:00

The freshness in the air and the sunlight at dawn, after a hard cold night.

The colours of flowers and the cent of the new rain. The blue skies and the clear, green meadows.

The chirp of the sparrows in the willow along the bubbling brook. The smell of coffeee and the newness of the morning.

The wakeful nights and the dreams of tomorrow, the ripples of uneasiness and the doubts of actions.

Hopes, dreams, aspirations.

What I may miss and what I will lose.

Will it be the same or will life go on, when you are gone.

2005-09-02T22:19:00.000-07:00

Graffiti.

My Private Tutor...

2005-09-01T12:47:00.000-07:00

I was having a tough time in mathematics class. I request the lecturer to help me out. He is hesitant in the beginning and finally helps me out with the statement that, these were the basics and I should have learnt it in the Eleventh standard. I finished my Eleventh in 1995, after that one year of Twelth, three years of college, one year as a designer and then finally 6 years of active service in the Armed Forces, and somehow he expected me to know all the basics of Integration, which he had just started teaching, a good ten years later for me!

This has not been the first time. Most of our teachers in our esteemed educational institutions take their jobs, well, just like a job. Their aim mainly has been to complete teaching what they have to for that period – Teach less and complete as much of the portions as possible. The end result? Failure of the learning process.

Now we must wonder what does the student do? He takes tuitions, most probably from a 'professional' institute, which are nothing less than mini colleges by themselves, or from the college lecturer himself – with the ruse that he will pass him. This.... is a vicious cycle. Ridiculous.

The question is who is at fault? The student? Who doesn't seem to understand in class but seems to really do well with tuitions, or is it the teacher, who is not giving his best in a college class but is an excellent tuition teacher?

Our culture is based on ancient texts like the Bhagavad-Gita, which is an offshoot of the epic Mahabharata. The same epic where the royal guru Acharya Drona and Arjuna live on for eternity. A teacher who refused and maimed a master archman Eklavya so that his student Arjuna would forever remain the best and unbeaten. The same Eklavya who made Drona's idol out of mud and took the same as his teacher and became comparable to Arjuna.

There is a lesson to be learnt here., not only for teachers and instructors of any kind, but for students too, that no matter what you do, only hardwork, dedication and steadfastness will pull anyone through. It would have been unimaginable if Arjun or Eklavya took tuitions.

The above text is only a generalisation. It is my personal experience with some of these teachers that prompted me to write this. All teachers are not bad. I do have my favorites, those who have molded me as an educated and morally right person. Taking tuitions is not bad too. I have taken tuitions myself. Sometimes you do need extra coaching to understand a subject better, like say literature and mathematics, in which case, the more practice you get, the better off you are. A teacher - student relationship, what i consider, is of an exchange of ideas, for the benefit of learning and should be as interactive as possible. But there are those who have turned this relationship to a money making scheme. My grouse is against those business minded instructors as well as those foolhardy students who encourage this failure of morals.

2005-08-31T11:48:00.000-07:00

A 'Malgudi Days' station....

Shine On You Crazy Diamond........

2005-08-31T11:19:00.000-07:00

Remember when you were young,
You shone like the sun.

Shine on you crazy diamond.

Now there's a look in your eyes,
Like black holes in the sky.

Shine on you crazy diamond.

You were caught on the crossfire
Of childhood and stardom,
Blown on the steel breeze.
Come on you target for faraway laughter,
Come on you stranger, you legend, you martyr, and shine!

You reached for the secret too soon,
You cried for the moon.

Shine on you crazy diamond.

Threatened by shadows at night,
And exposed in the light.

Shine on you crazy diamond.

Well you wore out your welcome
With random precision,
Rode on the steel breeze.

Come on you raver, you seer of visions,
Come on you painter, you piper, you prisoner, and shine!

Pink Floyd

2005-08-29T22:02:00.000-07:00

Indore Station.

Quote...

2005-08-15T11:52:00.000-07:00

"All men dream, but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are dangerous men, for they may act their dream with open eyes, to make it possible." – T. E. Lawrence

2005-08-14T05:46:00.000-07:00

My College.

Strange......

2005-08-13T00:00:00.000-07:00

http://www.hindu.com/2005/08/06/stories/2005080609730400.htm

A Nice App

2005-08-12T23:56:00.000-07:00

Copy this link in IE and do not maximize the
window...keep the window SMALL and see the 'magic'...

http://s94009834.onlinehome.us/xyz/move.html

2005-05-03T02:41:00.000-07:00

The salesman is almost lost in all the colour.

What We Miss Out.....

2005-05-03T02:24:00.000-07:00

From the saffron of the sunrise to the blood stained skies of the dusk. The breath of the morning dew to the scent of the new rain. The joyful colours in the neighbor’s garden and the tint of whites of the scattered clouds. The dusty pathway to a lonesome village and the merry chirp of a hundred sparrows at the roadside broken pipeline. The rise of the full moon and the cool breeze of midnight. The heady scent of the night queen and the songs of the never asleep cricket or is it the grasshopper. The sight of a moonless, theatrical, diamond studded night sky and the wish fulfilling streak of a shooting star.

The palette of life never satisfying enough, the search for beauty, if a search, never a wasted effort. The rainbow in the heart created by the sunshine of love and over-brimming happiness is not difficult. All you got to do is fall in love…..with life.

2005-05-03T02:20:00.000-07:00

Jayan, Naveen and me in an Arabian Nights shop...

2005-05-03T02:17:00.000-07:00

The ship of the dessert.

2005-05-03T02:16:00.000-07:00

Freedom. And the town of Jaisalmer.

2005-05-03T02:14:00.000-07:00

The coffee shop in the Fort of Mehrangarh. Thats me, Kunal, Jayan, Charu and Naveen with the servers in the back ground.

2005-05-03T02:12:00.000-07:00

Traditional folk artistes of Rajasthan.

2005-05-03T02:10:00.000-07:00

Nothingness to the faraway horizon.

2005-05-03T02:06:00.000-07:00

City in Peril.

2005-05-03T02:03:00.000-07:00

The blue city of Jodhpur from the Fort of Mehrangarh.

The Land Of The Kings.

2005-04-22T04:35:00.000-07:00

Rajasthan. The land of the Kings. My stay here for last three months were quite eventful. The vast expanses of the waste lands, and miles of sand is a visual treat. For me this clocks over 7000 kms of traveling over the last 6 months.

Living in the desert as a villager is totally different than the kind of life that we are so used to in the fertile regions of our country. The villages are small with 10 to 20 houses and large families. Water is scarce and the villagers most usually depend on the rains. They actually have a unique style of water storage and filtration. They dig sumps of about 20 ft with a dia of about 5 ft. lined with loose cement, they take about 6-7 hours to dig at the rate of Rs 300-400 per hour. The beat the earth around the sump to settle the sand. The sump then collects whatever rainfall it can. The sump reaches its peak efficiency only after a couple of rains. The water is stored in about 10 to 20 sumps per village. The water stored for over a year turns brackish and develops a layer of algae over it. The villagers, when require water, take the water and filter it in their homes and drink it. They prefer it to the salty ground water in most places.

There is practically no mobile coverage. Each village have atleast one PCO. Usually the only telephone for miles. Electricity is in cycles of 7 hours. There is power at 7 hour stretches. The timing is so that you have power for 7 hours in the day for a week then for 7 hours in the night for a week. Ofcourse I am talking about the villages. In the cities it is slightly better. All the villages are well connected by road with vehicular traffic of atleast one bus per day. Its really amusing when you are driving for hours and suddenly a village pops out from nowhere.

They tell me that Rajasthan is a lot greener from what it was about 10 years back, all thanks to the Indira Gandhi Canal. You actually see a lot of greenery next to the canal. Its actually like that of a dense jungle. There was one thing that I found strange about the vegetation along the canal. The trees along the cannal is green, then there is a band of dead trees for about 25 mtrs all along the canal. The greenery then begins again. This is true for most of the vegetation along the canal. Nobody has a logical enough explanation for this.

We did a lot of traveling to all the forts and tourist areas we could get time to explore. One place that is noteworthy of mention is the Mehramgarh Fort in Jodhpur. It is a medium sized fort looming majestically over the town of Jodhpur. The fort was totally self sufficient when it was populated. The water supply system in the fort is interesting. Water is pulled up from tanks below the fort along the high walls. It is then poured over the turrets which have channels for the water, which inturn carry the water to the rest of the fort. There are many windows in the fort and the view from each window goes far and wide. The guns are still there pointing towards the vast expanse to protect the fort from its enemies. Though most of the range of the gun has been taken over by the population of the town. The fort boasts of a small museum within, with many an interesting artifact. There is a small coffee shop within the fort too, though the rates are exhoribant. A bottle of cheap wine for 1100 bucks. I have had better for cheaper. But then again it was agreat experience.

The people of Rajasthan, especially the villagers, are the most friendly that I have met. The children were particularly exited whenever they saw us Faujis. But something that really hit us was the prevalent caste system. One of my colleagues stopped by and chatted with a kid of about 10 years. The first thing that Naveen was asked was what his jaath was. One more time me and Naveen were sitting in our makeshift mess when this old villager walks by. We invite him to share our lunch with us. When the server gave him a plate he asks him what his caste is. That got us really irritated. We gave the old man a choice, take the food silently or take a kick. So much for our charity. But the people are really friendly. They allowed us to use their wells wherever we set up our camps. The have deep respect for the armed forces, something that is rare to come by. Civilians in the cities everywhere else look at you as if you are from a different planet altogether.

Some trivia that we came across during our stay in the wild wild west.

The erstwhile kings sometimes had 20-22 queens.

The temperatures are close to 50 in the day and around 10 in the nights.

Land is costly. The rates in Jaipur are about Rs 17000 per sq yd, the cheapest being Rs 7000 per sq yd

People are very colourful in their clothing. Their traditional linen is something called ‘bandhni’, hand dyed block printed clothing.

Things you should have if you plan to visit. An SUV, lots of water, lots of money for all the curiosities you will want to buy, warm clothing definitely if you visit during the winters… the best times being Oct-Nov or Feb-March and a world space receiver --- there is no FM.

2005-04-22T04:26:00.000-07:00

Sand Surfing....

2005-04-22T04:22:00.000-07:00

Against the walls of Fort Mehramgarh in Jodhpur.

2005-04-22T04:18:00.000-07:00

Sheep grazing in scantiness of the dessert. Cattle and livestock happen to be their almost only means of survival of the villagers during the dry seasons.

2005-04-22T04:16:00.000-07:00

One of the many huts of the villagers in Rajasthan. And this is no movie set.

2005-04-22T04:14:00.000-07:00

The many "Twisters" we came across in the dessert. They go up to about 20 ft high but not the least dangerous.

2005-04-22T04:12:00.000-07:00

Foxy. The pup we picked up in the desert. Now its a member of our family.

2005-04-22T04:10:00.000-07:00

Express Highway through Gujrat.

2005-04-22T04:05:00.000-07:00

We spent a night under a Mango Grove In Vapi. Vapi in Gujrat is famous for many of its industries, particularly Pidilite Ltd (Fevicol) and Micro Inks (They make printing inks for magazines like National Geographic and Time, and have a presence in over 59 countries......all Indian.)

2005-04-22T04:02:00.000-07:00

Sunset in Daman and Diu..

2005-04-22T03:59:00.000-07:00

The black sands of the beaches of Daman and Diu. We stopped by here on our drive through the Union Territory.

Within the Mask.

2005-01-21T04:36:00.000-08:00

I was going through my old CD collection today and i came across my old Michael Jackson Video collection of the Album "History". I played one of my favorite videos, that of the MTV music awards 1998 where he had given an excellent performance. After the end of his part of the show the crowd had gone altogether hysterical. There were shots of his sister Diana Jackson nodding with appreciation of her brother's performance.

A brother who had been a victim of almost every bite of fame, own and others. To begin with he had the pigmentation of his skin changed so that he would not be discriminated as Black. Hours of practice gave him the gift of perfectness which he exploited until his body broke down. His own personal life went for a jump with two divorces (atleast that i know of). He was then branded as a pedophile by people who accused of him sleeping with their own children. Today he is nowhere. He has filed for bankruptcy and no one remembers him, until maybe one day when he is dead.

Closer home.
An armed forces officer while doing his duty charged for the rape of a mother and her daughter. He is now proven innocent by DNA tests. One should consider the pain that he would have undergone during the time when he was taken as accused. His family, his friends, his unit would all have been affected. Today he is no more charged for the crimes he was accused of. But the punishment has already been conferred. For the rest of his life he and his family will remain branded.

Two kids in a Delhi school experimenting with each other. One records it with the camera in his phone. It spreads like wild fire all over the country. (I got access to it myself but could not get myself to watch it....come on they are just kids man!). Once again all the unsolicited media attention. The parents cannot leave home coz the media follows. The children cannot study in school coz nobody wants to sit with them. The teachers cannot teach coz they now belong to a school with no morals. Good lord...just because two kids did not know the consequence of their actions. The action? They recorded their actions. Voyeurism made them famous, other than that its an open fact about sex in schools. We only chose to be blind.
Death of innocence.

A girl is rushing towards stardom. She choses the most easiest and the most common method, sex. One of the rungs in the ladder records it. Viola – Miss Jammu case. Now forensics say its not her. But who cares. As long as she is concerned she is as good as dead. No one will marry her. Family will not forgive her. The world wont forget her. Another living death.

How much of us is dead when we are alive. Is time the healer or is time the killer. We have more access to each others' personal lives than two years back. At this rate one day we will live in glass houses. Are we to blame for ourselves or are we to blame others. Maybe its both. Mans quest for more, whether its for fame or for information, will always be peppered with sprinkles of shame to himself.

But in the end only those survive who have dignity and honour. For only they will not fall into the depths of shame, because their heads are held high and their gaze towards the skies.

2005-01-07T09:04:00.000-08:00

Thats not a stray animal. Its our company pet -- Suwarna. Found by one of our men at the back gate of our unit, as a lamb,one stormy cold Jammu night

2005-01-07T09:01:00.000-08:00

These kids got really happy when they saw us.

2005-01-07T08:58:00.000-08:00

Train Window Photo.

2005-01-07T08:55:00.000-08:00

Colourful India.

2005-01-07T08:49:00.000-08:00

Me in the engine. A childhood dream come true.

2005-01-07T08:47:00.000-08:00

Us...

2005-01-07T08:45:00.000-08:00

Sunset by the tracks.

Poetry.

2005-01-07T08:21:00.000-08:00

Some really simple and nice poetry......
http://ashwita.blogspot.com/

2005-01-07T06:19:00.000-08:00

Temptation.....

A Farewell, A Funeral.

2004-12-26T23:11:00.000-08:00

I never knew being in a peace station could be so hectic.

Yesterday i was in a farewell party in which a few men of our company were getting posted out and one of them was retiring. They were being given the complete treatment...... garlands, giftts, farewell speech with only good things being told about them, tears.... They were surely going to be missed for a long time to come.

I couldnt help to think (in the wierd mind that i have), it resembled that of a funeral. The garlands, the good things being told of the deceased, tears.....

Even they are missed for long.....

But in the end all are forgotten.

2004-12-24T07:02:00.000-08:00

My sister - Rowena. She came to Secunderabad for the weekend to visit me. She works for Infosys in Bangalore. The tunic she is wearing is hand made and available chiefly in Jammu and Kashmir. Its about Rs 150/-. (P.S. -- Its about 800 bucks in Bangalore !)

2004-12-24T06:59:00.000-08:00

The boat in which we went boating on Hussain Sagar lake

2004-12-24T06:52:00.000-08:00

There was even a dance show on the boat to entertain us.....

2004-12-24T06:50:00.000-08:00

The Budha Statue in Lake Hussain Sagar, Hyderabad. While they were installing it a couple of decades back, they dropped it into the water. They put deflated floats under the statue, underwater, and then inflated it..... Forcing the statue to finally float on water. The whole affair cost the government a few crores.

2004-12-24T06:42:00.000-08:00

A Banyan tree decorated by the Hyderabadis for god knows what. This tree is near the Hussain Sagar lake in Hyderabad. Thats my sister - Rowena, me, Himanshu and Charu in the photo.

New Base.

2004-12-04T10:59:00.000-08:00

This is the longest I have been from a net connection in recent times. I now connect from a Hutch phone to the net. Finally the technology is in India and about time...

Now we are in a peace station. Secunderabad.

A far cry from the militant infested mountains of Jammu and Kashmir. It feels so odd to walk about without a weapon. You feel somethings missing when you go to the market or a movie. Yes the armed guards who always accompanied me everywhere no longer are with me. Now thats freedom. Four years in hell in the so called 'Jannat' has me really old and tired.

Gods own forsaken land. Where the people have a different idea of independence. People who value peace on their endless wait for the same. Sometimes it feels great to live so happily in a place like Bangalore where the people have no idea of whats going on in
J & K.

The mess of a place that it is, is compounded by the lack of any kind of industry that may sustain a common man. You either have a shop or you have a field. There is practically no public transport, atleast not something you can be proud of, no entertainment avenues and all the glitterati that a decent town or a city holds. Buying land is illegal. Renting is risky. The people survive with sheer hope and refuse to leave for much more peaceful parts of the country.

So why do i miss the place?

Guess its too beautiful.

Worth fighting for.

Worth dying for.....

2004-11-21T11:21:00.000-08:00

Wallpaper

2004-11-21T11:20:00.000-08:00

Whole villages buried in the snow during winters. The people migrate to warmer places during the winters and return for greener pastures for their cattle in the summers.

2004-11-21T11:19:00.000-08:00

Thats me again on one of those days.

2004-11-21T11:18:00.000-08:00

Thats me with the smoke. The chopper from where this photo was taken just dropped the essential supplies for our survival.

2004-11-05T12:15:00.000-08:00

Me and my Kalashnikov, with Mt Viagra in the background.

Of Heroes And Villains

2004-11-02T01:00:00.000-08:00

Its all on the papers.

Osama lives. And he is talking.

On the eve of the American presedential elections he is becoming a kind of embaresment to the Bush administration.

Its sad to know that sometimes people in power take themselves no less than a god. Afghanistan, a country trying to establish itself and regain its lost bearings was bombed to kingdom come just for the head of one man. Did the allied troops ever think that in doing so they were not only killing people who were just trying to have a normal life, they were killing dreams and putting them back in the same place where they began. The soviets took the first kill, then the Talibans and finally the Americans. Its like all the people who sinned in their previous births were born in the same place. Their fault? they were just not educated or rich enough to be heard. Their cries lost in the gunshots of revenge.

Revenge.

An excuse to keep harming each other.

Its like the Americans, the guardians of peace for the planet, do not just get it. The whole nation cries when one of their soldiers die. But turn a deaf ear when a whole nation cries. Actually its wrong to damn a whole nation for the sins of a few men. Men who have no idea of what they are doing. Only hoping that whatever it is, it must be right. An example is Tony Blair apologising for Iraq.

At this time its confusing to decide who is the villain and who the hero. Is it President Bush who felt that by wiping out Afghanistan and Iraq, his people will live in a safer country, or is it Osama or the numerous militant organisations in Iraq in a beheading spree, thinking that vengeance is being served.And their people given justice.

Why should the people of a country be scarred with the memories of war for eternity just because a few men thought that it was the right way. Violence begets violence and love love. But love for violence begets only death.The only thing that can be said is that there is no more honour in the wars we fight. Gone is age when the whole world went to war to vanquish the all powerful despots and lunatics. When war was a celebration and a hope for better times for the children of millions who were to die in the infamous concentration camps, just because they were born Jews or of a lesser race.

Realisation.

A word without a meaning for those who find meaning in vengeance.

2004-11-02T00:29:00.000-08:00

Me, Swetha and Naveen - with backdrop of Bahu Fort - in Jammu. The dried river bed is that of Tawi river which flows through Jammu City. Thats why the city is also known as Jammu Tawi.

Pride And Prejudice.

2004-10-30T04:00:00.000-07:00

Today was a very busy day....and also a very funny day.
It was 10 in the evening. I was in the officers mess having my drink when i got an emergency call. The incident was so that, one of our vehicles had stopped in front of a unit gate and the driver had got down to prove his identity. But the goof had placed his vehicle in neutral and the vehicle rolled over the hill .... hitting the gate and totally destroying it.

I had to give up my drink and rush to the spot to acess the damage.The adjutant of the unit was already there, and more than acessing the damage it was save your face for me. I had to apologise for the soldier very sheepishly and the adjutant just could not stop laughing at the incident. Good i knew her or we were for a very tough evening.

The thing is that sometimes our soldiers do such idiotic things that are beyond the comprehension of normal thinking. But they are the same people to whom we depend our lives on. One thing that is noticiable is that collectively they are a strong force, singularly non-existent. It takes all the time and patience of an officer to take into account the situation and manage the task satisfactorily.

Another thing many civilians and Army probables think that the Army is all about sitting in the border and protecting the boundaries of our motherland. But the truth is that, its just a small part of our jobs. Most of our energy and time is spent on keeping the troops fit and their morale high. Make sure that they get right pay and dont go for an overdraught, get their food in the right time,get their clothing issued in regular intervals, take speacialised training capsules, keep the unit in ship shape form and in that time when you are deployed for an operation make sure your troops are ready to take on any danger possible with a "pinch of salt".

The problem is you get to see more administration than you see action,(some do see a lot of action, but then like i said, some...), and this leaves many an officer in the begining years of their service dissapointed. They keep raving for action but most usually are again dissapointed with "only" administration. But this does not mean they are disgruntled, which most usually is thought so, they learn as they grow in service the importance of administration. The sinscerity is never lost and the "josh" remains. Somethings in the heart never die.

The one other most dissapointing part of serving in the army is the media. They seem to just waiting to bite our backs. They want a scandal in the army so that they can feed their tummies, and in the same breath they want us to do a good job so that thay can sleep in the nights peacefully. Now thats what you call an oxymoron (i would prefer moron). Its not fun when the media slings mud like on a major who seemed to have taken fake videos on killing pakistanis in the impossible terrains of siachin. Come on guys--- thats a place where you are fighting to live, and the last thing you are going to do is produce a movie!

Temperatures range to upto -50 deg cent. For atleast 6 months you dont see a single blade of grass, leave alone trees. No people, no movies, no drinks, no smoke - only snow, mountains and the damn mist. People lose their limbs if they dont wear the right thickness of gloves.
Every moment of yours is a pain. You are in an altitude of above 18000 ft. You have all kinds of problems like high blood pressure, breathlessness, loneliness, and the pain of seeing others in pain. Even bacteria does not survive there. And finally when you come down you are a wreck. You most probably are not able perform sexually, in the worst of the cases, and you have conditions like high blood pressure for the other half of the rest of your miserable lives.

And you have the energy and time to produce a movie and a fake one at that?. Then trust me the guy really deserves a medal and the government has not made a mistake in giving him one.
Ladies and Gentlemen, he just made the first and only motion picture in the world's highest battlefield and also one of the most inhospitable regions of the world. He deserves an oscar.

In the end allow me to quote one of the most patriotic songs ever made in the country. One of my personal favourites and loved by millions..... and this is dedicated to the Indian media.

Mazab nhin sikhata, Aapas mein pier rakhna,
Hindi hain hum, Hindi hain hum, Vatan se,
Sare Jahan Se acha, Hindusthan Hamara.

(Religion does not teach us to interfere in each others affairs! We are indians, and our country is the best in the world.)

Here is a good humour page....
http://www.armyinkashmir.org/v2/laugh_bytes/humour_uniform.shtml

2004-10-19T13:41:00.000-07:00

This structure is 100% paper mache. This amazing stuff was in the art exhibition i went to today on the pavements of M.G. Road.

My Busy Day.....

2004-10-19T13:31:00.000-07:00

Today was quite an hectic day.

I did a lot of travelling.

It started with me going along with Vinay to M.G. road for a an art exhibition on the non shopping side of the road. It was great to look at all the pieces of art made by the artists, but as usual the art pieces were beyond anything like affordability.

I also had my hands read by a passing astrologer. He promised me to tell me everything. For 51 bucks i felt it wont matter much. He began with how great a person i was and how bright my future was. He told me that i had many family problems and all this could be solved astrologically. I would have to pay him 800 bucks and then he would give me a piece of cloth which i will have to keep immersed in water for five days. After five days the cloth would disintegrate and so will all my problems. Oh bother....

People whom these astrologers go around should be really naive. The mind job he atleast tried on me was impressive. Any religious guy would have just taken him as fish to water and given him good buisness. Or had he already?

Later in the evening i went to the Kanteerva indoor stadium for a jewelry exhibition. They claimed to have on display crores worth of jewels. They had a variety of jewelry but the place was so damn crowded, it was actually difficult to breathe. Also not everyday you dont see so many women whose eyes are glittering at the same time. All the husbands must have lost months of pay today after seeing the buisness these guys were doing.

Another interesting thing that i missed the previous day is that they finally killed Veerappan. The notorious forest brigande who smuggled sandalwood and poached elephanta for almost 30 years was finally killed by the Speacial Task Force (STF) - what i consider as the most defunct organisation of our country. Veerappan has been responsible for murdering over hundred people, the list including even the top brass of the STF and the police.He also had kidnapped Kannada superstar Rajkumar and had kept him hostage for more than 100 days. He had also kidnapped an ex minister and killed him. What do i have to say about this? - Well Wow ! This guy was something or the STF is actually the most defunct organisation i have come across. They were even celebrating his felling along with four of his accomplices. Well shame on you STF for taking 36 years what you should have done within a month.

The links for Veerappan
http://in.rediff.com/news/2004/oct/19spec3.htm
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/891241.cms
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/890783.cms

What Another One???????
http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/articleshow/890849.cms

Some cool stuff about Veerappan
http://people.indiatimes.com/articleshow/890960.cms

2004-10-17T10:09:00.000-07:00

The Utility Building. Bangalore's tallest building.

Last Sunday.....

2004-10-17T10:01:00.000-07:00

The last sunday of the rest of my holidays.

There was a tinge of sorrow somewhere at the back of my mind as there were only two days for my holidays to end. Today also happens to be a major Coorgi festival. The place where the river Kauvery emerges begins to bubble violently on this day every year without fail. Some of the mysteries that i cant figure out.(apart from ghosts).

I met Chaithanya, my colleague of my teaching days. We spent most of the day with a friend of his - Jeffrey. An interesting person whose family had a history of royalty. The riches lost over the years to such an extent that he lives unmarried in a single roomed appartment. Tragic?

Two days to go and then back to the daily humdrum of Army Life......

2004-10-17T10:00:00.000-07:00

My cat over our car.

Fuel

2004-10-17T06:45:00.000-07:00

Today was a good evening after a long time. Me and my friend Vinay went to a small nondescript pub called Fuel. A very small place with the D.J. playing some really good music. Me and Vinay did a lot of soul searching and in short had a very good time.

Today i came to know of a story that happened a month ago which proves nothing but what evils mankind is possible of collectively.

A month back a TATA Sumo overan a person. The people who were responsible were never caught.
This did leave the citizens of the locality very upset, for the pain they had to possibly witness for the family of the bereaved.

A week back another TATA Sumo, one belonging to the company that Vinay belonged to, was trying to overtake a motorcyclist. I guess he honked one too many times but the motorcyclist did not budge. The motorcyclist did, but, stop in the same locality where the accident had occured a month back. The motorcyclist got down , in turn stopping the Sumo, and verbally abused the driver of the S.U.V. Soon a crowd gathered and physically abused the driver of the Sumo. The excuse?, well the excuse was the accident that happened a month ago and the anger was that the same crowd was not able to do anything about it. The driver was assaulted till he bled. Seeing this one of the passengers went to stop the disturbance, but then he was assaulted too. The crowd went further to threaten a lady, supposedly pregnant, who started to cry hysterically seeing all this.

What the crowd was trying to prove is unknown. But all the while they were quoting the accident that happened a month ago. I doubt whether the real culprit ever came to know about the incident. But the story ends with the Director of the company going to the "basti" and requesting the "good" citizens that in future if any of his drivers get to fault, and if they find the company sticker on the vehicle, then they should call him up and he would resolve the issue favourably and peacefully.

Our country is still made up of people who decide what is wrong and right only during the heat of the moment. If not then there would no longer be theatres destroyed trying to exercise freedom of speech or there will no longer be Godhras where the only people who profited were those who stood for elections. Communalism is not a state of mind or freedom of speech revoked. It is nothing but the attitude of the people who suddenly become religious or supposedly "realise" that their religion or sect is endangered to extinction.

And this does nothing but disgust me coz in everyday life i do have to deal with such people regularly. The very peolple who constitute a country that i serve. The very people that are supposedly proud of their actions.

2004-10-15T11:46:00.000-07:00

M.G. Road -- All wet and shiny in the rain.

Couriers.

2004-10-15T11:31:00.000-07:00

Today was an example of the apathies possible by mankind. I had ordered for a DVD writer from baazee.com. It was supposed to have reached me a week back. I checked it out with the courier service, DTDC Ltd, and learned tht it was still with them in one of their branch offices.

After my computer class i went to collect it from theit Domlur office, which is pretty far away, my way helped positively by a very helpful and nice person in the my bank. I colected my package and on my way back home got stuck in traffic. My curiosity got better of me and I opened the package, and what do I find?, the carton is full of waste paper and ofcoarse my bill. This really had me floored -- no DVD drive. I called Mumbai and spoke to the dealer. He told me that I should have opened the package in front of the courier, but anyway take it back and show it to them. With my fingers crossed I went back and they kind of accepted their fault. It seems that on the package cover the weight says 375 gms wheresas the folio that comes along with the package from Mumbai says 1.2 Kgs. Somewhere someone opened it and flicked the contents. Well right now they are investigating the loss and they have asked me to come tommorrow and speak to their customer representative.

I sat in the courier service for quite some time, and what I saw really impressed me. The setup was just like a post-office, only more suffosticated. They were packages coming and there were packages leaving, and they were in thousands. Packages of various shapes and sizes, packages from various parts of the country and packages to various parts of the country. Or maybe elsewhere. Everything was so organised and everything was so quick. I couldnt help thinking that maybe one day I may too own a courier company. I was thinking what I should do to keep it successful.

I would have to have various offices to start with in two cities. Make it really cheap and let the buisness grow a bit. Then open offices in another city, then another, then another.... But what is so diferent about my courier service that people will come to me than go to others? Well mine will have to be cheaper, qicker and able to assure guaranteed delivery, or your money back. It will be tough and I will have to wait for a long time to see it succeed, and I may lose quite some money in the begining, but with a lot of interest and acute monitoring, I guess its a good shot with good returns.

But for now I just hope that i get my 6 grands back for the writer......

Today I also saw some heavy rain in Bangalore, I guess the heaviest till now. Driving had become really difficult with all the water on the windshield.

2004-10-11T13:28:00.000-07:00

Me and Vinay in front of The plaza Theatre, M.G. Road

2004-10-10T04:18:00.000-07:00

My Edit in Photoshop

2004-10-10T03:46:00.000-07:00

My Cat

Cat Woman

2004-10-10T03:42:00.000-07:00

Today saw Cat Woman In VCD. Mmmm this movie doesnt really give you the high you usually get when you see a superhero movie. We have Halle Berry on one side trying really hard to be a hot cat and on the other end the movie is trying to make a story of a no story. Come on Hollywood stop showing people who come back from the dead just to give us innocent citizens justice.....

2004-10-10T03:41:00.000-07:00

Brigade Road from the Pizza Corner window. This photo was taken with my Nokia 6230

Freedom....

2004-10-10T03:37:00.001-07:00

Long time since I posted to the Blog. I had a very busy week. To start with I had my tooth extracted. The molar tooth tht lives right at the back of your mouth. The dentist had a tough time removing it and I had a tough time bearing him. The pain lasted for quite some time.

I met a friend of mime from J&K yesterday and then we went to Pub - World and had a couple of drinks. We then went to Pizza Corner in Brigade Road and had a Pizza. Brigade Road looks beautiful from the Shop. The shop is in the second floor and the windows are huge.You get to sit next to the window and can watch the world walk by below you. Me and Amit had a lot of fun just doing that.

We couldnt go for a movie. Why? --- Well coz there is a seven week ban on Any other movie being released other than Kannada movies. The members of Kannada Raksha Veddna (The save Kannada language people) caused a mini riot in one of Bangalore's muliplexes and broke many a window panes. This is the attitude that makes me feel that we still dont have independance of doing whatever we want or exercising free speech in a so called Democratic country. Atleast as long as unemployed, jobless fanatics like these exist.

Now this seven week ban on movies other than kannada movies didnt for sure encourage me to watch a kannada movie. But what it did was despise kannada movies more than ever. Kannada movies are movies of the worst kind. The actors have practically no acting skills and try to live a larger than life lives. The movies are practically made for tax evasion. There are no story lines and the movies usually contain nothing but untold violence and immense sexism. And they even have the nerve of calling it culture.

If I was a theatre owner in Bangalore I would have turned a blind eye to the ban, which of coarse is not legal, and continued to screen movies. As long as there are those who fear will live those who will be feared.

2004-10-03T13:18:00.000-07:00

The guy who's name I dont know, Puneet, me and Vinay in Guzzler's Inn

Night Out

2004-10-03T13:04:00.000-07:00

Another day passes and i had a great evening with my friend Vinay. My day started at 12 in the afternoon,thats when i woke up. Later in the evening i went with him to M.G. Road to see a movie - The Bourne Supremacy. But we did not make it to the movie in time -the 6 30 show was house full, so we bought the 9 30 show tickets.

We then decided to just go around when Vinay got a call from his friend Puneet. We went to Guzzler's Inn my favourite Pub coz they play good music there. The D.J. is pretty unassuming but the music he plays is good. KingFisher beer and good music is a heady combination. But i guess I had too much of it because later i slept through most of the movie.

I returned home at 1230 in the morning after leaving Vinay back in his house. Me and Vinay go back to our college days, pre university that is, and we been together for a good 8 years now.

Another point of mention was Vinay called up Ayesha, a girl whom we knew in our college days, and surprises after all these years she recognised my voice the moment I said Guess who. We used to be a good friend circle. This goes to say that you make friends only once but the friendship always remains forever if you are true to yourself and your friends. She now has a 2 year old baby girl called Dana.

Vinay and me spent a lot of time remembering our old days and he said something that i will Remember for days to come- "We had a low life, but we lived it high."

2004-10-02T16:01:00.000-07:00

Me and Vinay

Why A Blog

2004-10-02T15:53:00.000-07:00

Why did i decide to get me my own blog? I realised that i have a very active life and as forms of memories i required to put it down somewhere. Due to the nature of my job i cannot write it down, i most probably will lose my diary somewhere. A blog helps me to write from anywhere and just upload it. So here i am on leave for a month or so. All my friends are working on week days so i have nowhere to go. I spend most of my days sleeping and watching T.V. Today is a sunday so i may just go for bowling and some beer with my friend Vinay.